November 14, 2013

fleeting

I was just looking at this picture of my boys from this summer and thinking how big they've grown in the last few months. I constantly hear "they grow up so fast" and "don't let those precious moments pass you by" and I feel it. I also hear (and feel) guilt trip after guilt trip about spending too much time working on projects, taking too many pictures behind the camera and saying too few (or too many?) compliments to my children. Everyone has an opinion about how to be the right parent so you can "enjoy" these golden years, but when it comes down to it, time passes. Every day. Every minute. Every 24 hours. We can't slow it down and we can't go back. It makes me a little sad to see a picture like this one where I was behind the camera and not in front of it with my boys, but I took a picture and I have it to remember this moment by. I see this picture and I remember how William was making Fritz laugh so hard and they were being too naughty on that day to sit in church in Laguna Beach. Taking these pictures was a good moment and seeing this picture helps me savor that moment. I hope my boys see this photo someday and remember that right after we took these pictures, we walked up and down the street and pointed at every truck and dog that passed by. That Fritz had to stop every few steps and pick up a leaf or stray rock. I hope they remember that I held their hands and that I listened to William as he told me about how he saw "that cool thing over there". I know I will.
The saying that "the days are long but the years are short" is so true and I'm doing my best to enjoy them. I hope we can all be more kind and understanding when we tell parents to "enjoy" every moment. Let's all remember that "the days" are not only long but sometimes (just sometimes) they are so, so hard. Like, so hard that you curl up into a fetal position on the couch in the dark, after they are finally asleep, and just cry. Just me? That's OK if it is because most days are good. Most moments are good. It's all about picking yourself up after a good, long cry and remembering that you love your kids and your life and move on to enjoying it again.

P.S. This post was randomly written but it's what I'm thinking about tonight.

4 comments:

  1. I can relate to everything you wrote. Thank you!!

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  2. You are absolutely right, Lizzy!

    ... your boys are so cute!

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  3. I love you. I think capturing and documenting memories is so important! I'm always excited when I see something that sparks a childhood memory. Also, I'm basically a dementia patient at 31. I don't want to forget all those sweet things too!! Well said Love!

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  4. My older two are 16 and 17 and I am keenly feeling the impending empty nest and I don't want it! The 'halcyon' years when the kids were young - your kids' ages - were the happiest of my life. Of course I love seeing them grow, and become, and I yearn for a close relationship with them as they become adults. I hope they don't move far away and never look back, like some people do.

    I still have a 6th grader so there are many years ahead of life with kids in the home. It's so good.

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