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I tend to be pretty critical of myself and, sadly, other people as well. I think we all are that way to a certain extent but I wish I was better at not pointing out other's flaws - even if I don't vocalize it. I am so lucky to be married to someone who is incredible at never criticizing. I can honestly say that David is the least-critical person I have ever met. I am sure that he sees my many flaws but he is so kind that he has never pointed them out to me - even when I'm right in the middle of nicely giving some "constructive criticism". I saw a great quote on Pinterest the other day that said, "Your husband is only going to be as great as you think he is." I almost gasped when I read that because it is so true, and not just for husbands. Our friends, children and all other relationships in our lives will benefit from our positively thinking about them. Our actions reflect our thoughts and if you think kind thoughts about someone, you will treat them kindly too.
I remember my mom telling me about when she and my dad were first married and she was talking to a group of other newly-married women. As women often do when they get together, they were joking about the annoying habits their husbands had. My mom pitched in and said, "It drives me nuts that Russell doesn't fold up his wet towel before he hangs it up after he takes a shower!" All the other wives gaped at her and said, "Your husband hangs up his towel?" She realized after that how lucky she was and that things would've been better had she shown her appreciation for what he did rather than focusing on how he was falling short.
What I'm trying to say is, criticism isn't helpful. We are all full of flaws and I'm sure we hope that the people who are in our lives are willing to overlook those flaws. The world would be a better place if we would all offer each other the same courtesy. The best way to encourage someone to be great is by being great yourself. That's what I'm thinking about today.
I remember my mom telling me about when she and my dad were first married and she was talking to a group of other newly-married women. As women often do when they get together, they were joking about the annoying habits their husbands had. My mom pitched in and said, "It drives me nuts that Russell doesn't fold up his wet towel before he hangs it up after he takes a shower!" All the other wives gaped at her and said, "Your husband hangs up his towel?" She realized after that how lucky she was and that things would've been better had she shown her appreciation for what he did rather than focusing on how he was falling short.
What I'm trying to say is, criticism isn't helpful. We are all full of flaws and I'm sure we hope that the people who are in our lives are willing to overlook those flaws. The world would be a better place if we would all offer each other the same courtesy. The best way to encourage someone to be great is by being great yourself. That's what I'm thinking about today.
Oh Lizzy Lou this is perfect. I know so many people needed to hear this! Two things I've learned in life that have really helped me with this exact thing. First, a lesson by my Grandma Mavis. She talked about how she used to be shy and quiet and had a hard time in new wards and social situations. As you know my Grandma is a knockout, so it was probably surprising to others and maybe they even thought she was being arrogant. She said she realized she really appreciated when she was approached and it always made her feel good to be complemented. So she made a commitment to always be that person--and she is! I always-always love to make people feel loved and recognized. It makes me feel just as good as I'm sure it does them. The other great lesson I learned was from my Mom. I was always very critical of myself-as young girls are-and would focus so much worry on what others would think of me. My mom asked me what I thought of certain people. People she knows I love and respect and of course I had only good things to say. This was a reminder that if someone loves you they will only see the good and the other people just don't matter so love yourself! I might add that you are being modest as well. I never hear you talk bad about anyone and in fact you're very observant of the good qualities you see in others! You have always made me feel loved and that is the greatest gift a friend can give! Love you Mama!!!
ReplyDeleteSo very true! Thanks for the reminder to always look for the good and we will find it:)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing. These thoughts we been running though my head lately. It's nice to remember that other people are working on the same things as me and no or is perfect.
ReplyDeletethat husband quote is pretty great and so so true. i'm gonna remember that one. thanks for sharing these thoughts!
ReplyDeleteI just love this whole post. I'm just like you - I'm very critical in my head and even sometimes say it out loud. But how is that helping me? My hubby is the sweetest and sees the good in everyone. I want to be more like him!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this! Just what I needed to read!
ReplyDeleteWow, you've hit the nail on the head with this post. I sorely needed to read it! Thank you for taking the time to articulate your thoughts and feelings and sharing. Being overly critical of myself and, as a result, others, is something I've always struggled with. I have a difficult time making friends because of it, I believe. I've desired to be more like your friend Lela and I hope, with God's help, that I can be. That I can be a greater friend to my loved ones, myself, and those in my social circle. Thank you again for the uplift and motivation!
ReplyDeleteMy husband is the same way, so EASY, not critical and the only person he's ever confessed to not liking is my aunt who was unkind toward me. And EVERYONE likes him. He is a great role model for me.
ReplyDeleteLove, love love!!! Thank you for such a beautiful message.
ReplyDeletePerfect post. Definitely needed this. I think I'm a lot like you in that I have opinions, often strong ones, and thinking negatively about people isn't helping! Wise words as usual. ;)
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post! I have never commented before. I have been following your blog for probably about a year and a half and I love it :-)
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post!! I have never commented before, but I have been reading for probably a year and a half and I really do love your blog :-)
ReplyDeleteLiz, I think you are just fantastic and am so grateful to have you as a friend. I wouldn't change anything about you. Love you and thanks for the reminder to not be overly critical of others. Love you friend.
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